It's not about you

My walk leaving church

Last May I went to training before becoming an apprentice in Haiti. The other 20 or so people there were interning for the summer in a few different countries. One of the girls, Courtney, spent the summer in Kenya. When she started school again in the fall she started a blog for one of her classes talking about her time serving in Kenya. In October I read what she had to share. God told her, "Don't you see, none of this has to do with you? All of what you are participating in is about Me and furthering My kingdom. You can't be effective here unless you realize that you are nothing without Me and that your identity is in Me. You are not your clothes, your past, your hair, your story, you are simply my dear child." I did not want to hear this at the time. Isn't my story who I am? I thought I was in Haiti to be an example of Christ so lives would be transformed. Even now I have to remind myself that this, what I'm doing with my life, isn't about me. It's not even really about anyone who is watching my life. I am living a small story compared to the one God has written. The one where he and his kingdom are at the center. 

Dancing at the Christmas party in Mirebalais

During my time in Haiti God taught me who I am and that it's not prideful to own these characteristics. He revealed to me the image I had created of myself for protection from other's judgments. Once I was able to see and believe God's truth about me I was able to love others better. I am not as concerned about what others think or how they react to me. Now that I am confident in who I am I can see where God wants me to love and serve others.

If you know me, you know I like to read. I read a lot in Haiti and one book was called True Community by Jerry Bridges. In this book the author talks about the different ways Christians live. We should be abiding in Christ. This means instead of asking God for help to get through the day because of his power I should ask him to get me through the day because of his power. God and I are not equal working on a problem together, he is doing everything, and I am just the physical being here on earth the work is being attributed to.

Romans 15:18 God did his work through Paul. Paul acknowledged he does nothing on his own. 

Phil 2:13"For it is God who worketh in you both to will and do his will." 

Isaiah 26:12 "Lord you will ordain peace for us, for thou also has wrought all works after us."
Rms 8:28 and 2 Tim 1:9 I am called to do this right now, not because of my own works but because of his purpose and grace. It doesn't matter what I can do, I am called to do what God asks.

I noticed that the youth I became friends with want to evangelize to everyone they see and think that all Christians think this way. I am learning from them to tell my story so God is praised but it's not about me. It's not about them either, is it? The point is Christ.